A Land of Broken Dreams

I landed into a land of broken dreams in my early twenties. I just want to share how things started for me. When I crossed 20, mother was extremely worried about me as she became a mom at 20. She arranged many proposals but nothing worked. Mostly people were not ok with my looks. Some people were not ok with our small house. Some people were not ok with my studying at a professional university. Mostly men were taken in social setups of my family. An uncle of mine finally arranged a proposal for me. I was 23 and he was a divorced man of 40. My parents were not ok with the age difference and background of man. Mostly proposals were from married men. Things never worked with him and ended in breakup. Mostly I grew up with thoughts of settling in my early twenties. I thought life would be a fairy tale for me. I never thought of marrying already married men. I never thought of entering into a love triangle. I was never ok with the thought of being a second choice of some married dude. I always someone who was made for me. But things never worked this way. As time passed, I turned little rebellious and masculine. That was not what i wanted from life. I never had a fairytale in mind but this was not my wish. Most of my dreams shattered with time. Proposals from married men of two kids, four kids etc. No, I never wanted that. I chose a higher power in the end. This sour idea of relationship was never an ideal one for me. This was never wanted. Every women dreams of a partner who is available for her.